Categories: uncategorized
Date: 03 May 2008 20:25:28
Insufferable Bourgeoisie Recruitment
VACANCY
Vacancies have arisen at a series of busy parties in the west end of Glasgow for two UNBEARABLY SMUG MIDDLE CLASS MUMS (Grade II) to stand in the middle of the room and go on and on and on and on about their children and how fabulously funny they are and how hard it was to trade in the 4x4 for two smart cars but it's important to make sacrifices for the environment isn't it.
If you have a proven track record in talking only about yourself and your stupid friends, and a genuine and hostile inability to conceive that others might not share your ludicrously privileged worldview, you could be the person we're looking for. The successful recruits will have stupid and/or pointless day jobs, entirely fashionable streaks of socialism belying vicious and selfish natures, and no sense of humour.
Please note that this opportunity is for an indefinite period and that preference will be given to candidates with extremely loud voices. Self-awareness is discouraged. You will be expected to bring at least one child to the party with you, who should be awful.
Salary - 1 bag of antacids and the veiled hatred of everyone you meet. Send CV and references from at least two people you have made physically sick to: hrd@insufferable-bourgeoisie-recruitment.com.