Categories: uncategorized
Date: 28 September 2006 19:28:19
This is one of the funniest things I have read in a while.
My favourite bit is:
"Embrace Emerging Church. This is much easier than it sounds, and can usually be accomplished by completing the following four simple steps:
• Meet in an abandoned bus garage.
• Change your music. Emergent theology is taught through its songs. I'm mainly for stuff by Shakin' Stevens, Sister Sledge, or Madonna. For a youth congregation add Snow Patrol, for older people try Gene Pitney.
• Feng Shui your worship area. It looks hugely impressive on your church publicity, and the resultant seating arrangements can bring hours of amusement.
• Construct a large scaffolding tower, cover it with pictures of Catholic Saints and get everyone to stand around it with brown paper bags over their heads while holding scented candles. If anyone asks what it means, tell them it's post-modernist. They're bound to bring their friends next
week.
• Rent out the scaffolding tower as a phone mast. You'll get extra income and teenagers will attend just to get a better signal on their mobile."
There is a huge part of me just waiting for the day when the writer suggests this to the church he pastors, just to see their reaction ;)