Selfishness

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 11 September 2008 10:55:18

Today I am feeling my selfishness. I made a decision to go on an adventure and take a huge risk and as usual Third Party is the one having to go along with it.

She has been absolutely wonderful over the last few weeks and I have had the best relationship with her that I have ever had, but I am now realising that however resiliant and together she may be that my decision has had a huge impact on her life. I mean I knew this before, but was an ickle too wrapped up in my getting everything done to recognise quite what it must be like for her. I still don't quite get it, I can't never having been in her situation but I am realising it is all alot harder for her than she has been making it look.

This is something, as a society, I think we tend to do alot; take decisions which impact our whole families but without realising what we are doing to them. However, I am not about to feel guilty about it, I think I have done the right thing making the move, although I wish the job hunting was being an ickle more successful.

Anyway, if anybody does have any spare prayers please could they remember Third Party at the moment, being the newbie, away from all your friends, isn't easy. Also having to deal with the fact that mum is living in faith but is still job hunting and so you're not sure exactly how it's all going to work out can't be that easy to deal with either. Similarly whatever happens Third Party is having to also deal with a considerable drop in living standards and with a mother who is having "ethical issues" about the type of consumer choices she is now having to make. I made the choice and so am taking the consequences of my actions, she on the other hand has had it imposed on her. As I say it can't be easy for her and I am feeling extremely selfish.