Categories: uncategorized
Date: 16 December 2010 13:40:28
I have to speak on this later today. I told Third Party this and she just spat the word hypocrite at me. I did assure her that I sometimes fail in my attempts.
So how do I do it. I mean I must be able to because I'm still here balancing all the balls in the air and achieved the MA whilst doing the mum, work and study thing.
A few points to clarify my thoughts:
1) I have come to learn that my study is a job, but not a job with normal scheduled hours. When I go to a seminar or conference that is still "work". When I go off to do research that is "work time" and when I sit with a book making notes that is still "work".
2) I have needed to work part-time, (and indeed full time when I was doing my MA) but I have not needed to do so at the expense of my health. During the course of my time in Durham I have had to take the brave step of resigning two different posts (one when I first got here and the cleaning one more recently) when they were dragging me down to a point where I could not successfully survive. Also though there have been times when I have dug within to get through and keep going with jobs I knew were right to keep going with. Basically the question I have learnt to ask is: Can I keep doing this and keep my health together in a way which means my study won't also suffer?
3) Family do matter. Now I am kak at remembering this bit. I generally just further antagonise them when I "schedule them in". What I mean with this point, though, is you need to make sure that when it's their time you actually put down the book or keyboard and give them your full attention. This is actually easier with younger children than older ones I have discovered....partially because you always knew you would have that time after they'd gone to bed before.
4) Keep your diary like a military operation and a list of all the tasks you have to complete for all the different parts of your life. It may drive others mad but it will ensure you get all you need to done.
5) Be ready to take the help of others when offered. Ok, so another one I'm a bit kak at, but often if others know what you're juggling they will offer to help in small ways. Don't take advantage of their kindness but don't be too proud to benefit from what they want to do for you either.
6) Allow yourself time too. You are not just the student/ partner/ employee/ mother. You are also you and you need time to recharge your batteries. Take time out to do stuff you enjoy - this may involve physically distancing yourself from books, computers and such like. Or find a short amount of time regularly to read something not work related, (even if it's just Cosmo).
7) Give others the permission to tell you when they think you're getting it out of balance.
Like I say, I'm not great in this area but I am forever learning and implementing new strategies. If anybody else has anymore suggestions feel free to add them in the coments.