Categories: uncategorized
Date: 26 January 2008 08:12:13
Apparently Tricia says that normal is just a washing machine cycle. Whilst on one hand I agree with that the idea of normality is still an incredibly powerful concept which some of us spend way too long trying to achieve, however much we know we're never going to quite get there.
In this search for normal having a set of labels like "Divorced", "Lone Parent", "Dyke", "Activist" or even "Christian" isn't helpful. With labels like that you have to accept that you'll ever only make it to being about as normal as Phoebe off Friends. So you do one of two things; you either accept that you're never going to make "normal" and heavily promote the idea of "I'm just me and don't do labels" or you do your best to reduce the number of labels you have, sometimes consciously avoiding gaining them.
I have to say I try and use the first strategy but often live a life based on the second. I also feel very strongly that everybody should have equality of opportunity but that positive descrimination is wrong, which means on a personal basis I don't want to ever feel that anybody is making allowances because of x, y or z.
Whilst this may on one hand be sensible I am also coming to understand the effects of this may be that my life be much harder than it needs to be because of my stubboness and unwillingness to admit I'm not totally normal or that I may find it useful to do things a little differently because I'm me. Recently at work I ended up having to admit that I have some kind of visual issue because my attempt to quietly use the strategy that worked had failed. As a result I ended up being referred onto the learning support department who are putting me through the process of assessment.
After a quick initial chat it was discovered that the use of an orange overlay would vastly improve my quality of life when reading. I have to admit I am amazed at the difference it is making and the way that words now stay still and straight on a page.
Now the sad thing is I have known for a couple of years that there is a strong likelyhood I have Irlens but have been unwilling to get tested because I didn't want another label. Also I took the view I have got through this far, gained a variety of bits of paper and built a career without any problem so why get help now I was obviously doing ok and had developed my own appropriate range of strategies before I had even heard of the term Irlens.
So the lesson of all this is sometimes getting the label can lead to a simple solution (like an orange bit of plastic) and an easier life. This is, in the long run, is probably far more useful than trying to appear normal.