Categories: uncategorized
Date: 05 March 2005 17:09:15
So tomorrow's Mothers Day. Not normally a day I particularly enjoy because it tends to focus on particular shapes of motherhood and family generally.
However this year it's going to be different as during the last week I have experienced aspects of parenting which have made me realise what it's all about. (apologies to those of you desperately trying to avoid this weekend, but I'm going to write this to counteract all those it's a day for mums ideas put forward in an idealised
way by marketing men who have no idea).
Monday - Third Party and I played snowballs on the beach. We shared fun and that sense of excitement that you get from something completely different. That was a "grace moment" one of those aspects of parenting you can't buy but which make the memories.
Wednesday - The schools situation arose. In those moments that Third Party opened the envelope and read the letter and immeadiately afterwards I shared in her pain and uncertainty, aware that there was no way I could go where she was, but that it was my responsibility to be the person who was just there for her, making it safe for her to express whatever emotions she was feeling. I know her better than anybody else and so I could tell, wthout words, the depth of the hurt she was feeling just by looking at her. That put me in a position I hadn't experienced before really, because it was such an intense situation which rocked her world.
So for me this year mothers day isn't about the commercial side, or anything Third Party may or may not give me (that's not saying that I'm not hoping) but rather as a day for recognising what my role as a mother is and taking it as a day to recommit to that role.