Categories: uncategorized
Date: 24 May 2006 07:50:35
Today's adventure into the wild life of Chops and Mrs Lovely One may sound much more racy than it really was. But I could not resist the title. Also before we start the story proper if you are a visual person and you know me I apologise for any damage I am about to do to your psyche.
I was on night shift and finished quite early and was going straight from work to a party. I had a technical problem and needed Mrs Lovely One to rewash my favourite party shirt and bring it in so I could wear it at the party. Because I am a big boy now, I wear my uniform in and so I needed to get changed. I had also left my jeans in the car as well. I changed my shirt in the car park but was still a ways to go to transform from working stooge guy to sexy sophisticated party guy. I got in the car and while waiting for the lights took my shoes off. At the next lights I fully managed to get my pants off completely. I did not have the chance however to get the jeans on. I then waited till the next lights which was a couple of minutes away. It was getting a little chilly in the Chopsmobile when I realised the error of attempting all of these phsyical feats with the window down. I do wish to say it was dark and no one could see in anyway. I did manage to get the jeans on successfully as well as my slip on shoes.
For those of you out there who may think of trying to attempt this and be just like Chopd here are some hints for young players.
1. Do NOT attempt this in a manual vehicle.
2. Keep one foot on the brakes at all times (if possible).
3. Always apply the hand brake (see rule 2). You don't want to hit someone else and have to put "I was changing my pants at the lights". I am sure that would not go down well with the kids at the insurance company.
4. Always remember to take the hand brake off as well. Trust me in your rush this can happen and you will wonder why the car seems "sluggish".
5. Ensure that all zippers/buttons are down. This will make putting the trouser on or off so much easier.
6. Try only to do one leg at a time. Otherwise you will get tangled and you will have one foot with which to drive with if the lights changed.
7. Keep your eyes open. Try and see what the other lights are doing so if you see the other lights go orange you know you have about 5 seconds left.
8. Don't get pulled over by the Cops.
9. Only try this if you are Chops.
We safely arrived at the party with one sexy looking Chops and Mrs Lovely One and no one else at the party were the wiser that good ol Chops got changed in the car whilst driving.
Till Next Time Just Try It One Leg At A Time,
Chops