Categories: uncategorized
Date: 29 January 2008 08:39:33
Today I'll mainly be heading for the secret underground bunker that I built last night while FW was sleeping. You see we're all under threat from an asteroid that is going to passing "close" to Earth.
Then, just before moving into the bunker, I discovered that "close" actually means 343,000 miles away. Now that is not close by any stretch of the imagination. Maybe in terms of "space" it is deemed close but not by any earthly definition I know of.
However the Eggheads are going to use this as an opportunity to discover the best means of destroying an asteroid. Then, when the big one comes, they'll know what to do. I hear that Bruce Willis is strapping on his spacevest as we speak and muttering "Yippeekayaaaaa Mo'fo". Yes, some scientific nutter has decided that Hollywood had a good idea to destroy one using missiles. Know they're going to work out if it's possible.
I however hoave come up with a sure fire way of dealing with such "Deathly Destruction From Space". I'm going to propse that we make a giant cricket bat that we'll orbit near to the International Space Station (White Elephant for short). Then when asteroids approach Earth they can be sliced to deep square leg or returned over the bowler's head for 4.
Of course, it would be best NOT to use an English batsman for this sort of big occasion.