Categories: uncategorized
Date: 26 October 2008 22:06:01
So, I've got a new job. I'm temping 5 days a week, 37.5 hours, at a hospital in Bradford. This is great, it gives me money. The only problem is...I'm exhausted. The PVFS has come back with avengance and I'm struggling to function for chunks of most days. My strategy on this has been to ignore it, and I've had a really bad headache for the last 3 days on top of lack of concentration and general illness. The only thing I do other than work is roleplaying, twice a week. I know this is contributing to the tiredness factor, but I'm too stubborn to give it up.
If I stopped roleplaying I would loose the one activity at the moment that makes me me. I would just work, come home, crash, sleep and then start again, instead of having two days when that is broken and I see people outside my house. The best solution would be to try and reduce my hours at work - work a four day week, but I'm temping, and doubt that that could happen. I'm worried that if I even ask I'll end up loosing this job, and this job is the first steady job I've had and I"m kinda liking not having to worry that I won't have money to live on (my job makes me just enough for rent, bills, food and occasional clothes).
There is no winning situation here. If I stop my job I don't have any money/savings to fall back on and I'm worried the depression will come back. If I carry on the job and stop roleplaying my life will be reduced to work and I'll end up feeling isolated and crap, and if I carry on ignoring my illness then I'll gradually get worse and worse until I crash.
There's no way out.