Say it isn't so...

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 02 December 2003 21:42:40

I walked into a shop this morning and this line from a cheesy song just said what i was feeling. I'm just realising that the person who has been invading my thoughts with silly little memories of services and youth fellowship meetings and jokes and laughs and violence (the game) and tears and work experience and carnivals and christmas plays and hundreds of other tiny aspects of life is dead.

I found out on sunday that my minister (from my home town - marple) died last saturday. Went to church and cried my heart out.

Today i had a history trip. To manchester. To methodist central hall. I ended up crying again.

The funerals on Saturday and TBH i'm scared. What i'm scared off i'm not sure. But some how i am.

My minister wasn't just an etherial being who stood in the pulpit and preached hell fire and damnation...he was part of my life, of our lives...leading the CU mission, standing on his head in the christmas service, helping me thorough loads of crap, having open houses and letting us into his house for youth fellowship...

I don't know what to say now.

At the risk of sounding selfish, it brought back all the memories of my dad. And that fatal moment when mum said "oh sophs he died" (she used sophs, it's not me protecting my name) and the silly dream i had that night and the confusion and the desire to run away and escape...My minister had two kids, the eldest is around the same age that i was when dad died. Dear God hold his family...