Categories: uncategorized
Date: 04 May 2004 13:00:41
I hate being alone when there are decisions to be made. That, and the fact that discussing anything important like this with my father inevitably leads to disagreement or to him worrying unnecessarily. AAAAGGGGGH!
I was right - my sicknote did run out today and I should have gone back to work. I can't get in at the doctor's until tomorrow evening, so that in itself is a nightmare.
I have the figures from County Hall about my income. To work the part time hours the school is suggesting would mean another £2000 drop in income. Too much, too much. Apparently I am covered to stay off sick until 10th June on full pay. I don't want to stay off, but it seems silly to go back, apart from the fact that Dad's now worrying like anything about how long I've been off and what this means for my employment record and my health (i.e. if I've been off work so long it must because I have a serious illness that I'm not telling him about, and he'll probably transfer that worry to the Smudgelets). And if I do stay off until mid-June, what then? The drop in income for the following three months is still immense. But if the only option is to go back full time....
This is too big for me to work through on my own and against a tight deadline. I don't know what's best. I don't know how little money we could manage on and I'm hopeless with finances, but I know I don't want to be harping on at the children all the time about not being able to afford things. I don't want to be stressed by managing a tight budget, but I don't want to lose the sense of having time to do things... especially the time to do things with the children who won't be children for ever. Yesterday I ignored the washing and sat doing brass rubbings with them (we brought a kit in London) and it was wonderful. Yes, the kitchen's a tip, but I can tidy that today while they're at school.
Heeeeeeeeeeeeelp!