Categories: uncategorized
Date: 22 March 2009 15:02:18
A chance to thank God for the two fantastic sons who bring joy to my life (grey hairs and stress, yes, but an equal measure of joy - I wouldn't be without them). For me, being a mother has brought a great sense of purpose and fulfilment, as well as a permanently stretched bank account.
A chance to thank God for the excellent foundation for life provided through the love of my family. Knowing the hardship my boys experienced in their early years makes me all the more appreciative of that. My father provided stability and a sense of safety that he never experienced as a child - I never knew my grandfather and my father rarely spoke about him, but the little I know of him from my mum explains much about my own Dad's insecurities. My mother provided wisdom and a tangible love. In my siblings I had a support network second to none. My childhood was a happy one and my adult life, too, has been one where I have been surrounded by love and security, even now. I miss my parents greatly and think of them often, but it is testimony to the start they gave me and all that they taught me that my life is built on those sure foundations.
A chance to thank God for my wonderful friend Honorary Auntie M. It breaks my heart to think of leaving her behind when we move away. She fills a little of that mum-shaped hole and I will miss her immensely, as I know she will us. Today we took her out for lunch.
A chance to thank God for my mother church. I have had so many wonderful church families as I grew up, each of them contributing in some way to the person I am now. And this morning I was overwhelmed yet again by their love and support for us. This morning especially I felt mothered by my church.
There was, of course, the inevitable sadness. Not only was it the first visit to church since sentencing, but more to the point, one of my boys was not there. As the Sunday School distributed gifts to everyone (men and women alike!) and were sent to give to their own parents first, there was joy at receiving from the Smudgelet, but a hard-to-hide tear at the knowledge that another young man should have been there giving out those gifts and charming the old ladies with his easy smile. The lump in my throat hearing with newly deepened understanding the Gospel account of Mary at the foot of the cross. The sadness at opening a gift from my eldest that he hadn't seen (the result of clandestine phone calls between him and Honorary Auntie M) and having to take a photo of it to send to him. But would I be without that sorrow? If I could turn the clock back, would I? Not a bit of it. I have two sons and I love and delight in them both, no matter what.
Though I shouldn't have had to make my own breakfast !