A New Beginning

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 10 December 2004 00:58:53

I guess it's good to start something as something in one's life is ending. I am therefore starting a wiblog as a 3 year relationship I had is ending. It's been quite dramatic, extremely exhausting, a bit terrifying and terribly depressing. Mixed in with all those emotions is a sense of relief and freedom. I guess I realised I would be happier outside the relationship than in it (For months, I haven't been happy with alot that has been happy in the relationship). I wasn't getting the physical affection that I like and I was feeling a bit used. Needless to say, I think both he and I need to do a bit more growing up before either party is willing to commit to anything and while that is terribly hard to admit and accept, ending the relationship is probably a good thing. It's hard to match two people that want different things out of life and relationships, or if one person in the relationship isn't really sure what they want out of a relationship. That makes it a bit hard on the other and seems unfair.

*deep breath*

I never thought myself a very good writer so strange that I should start a wiblog as therapeutic relief from my life at the moment. I guess it's good to be able to write your feelings down and to read them over, it helps you straighten them out in your own head.

Currently trying to get work done. I have been trying to keep myself busy to help matters, moving furniture around, cleaning, being out of the house. When I sit down and think about it all, it makes me a very sad person to be around and I don't like that. My poor housemate has had to put up with me staying up till all hours and being in tears in the morning about it all. It's good that I have support though, I do have great friends (one that even offered a lesbian liaison if I couldn't find anyone to stop me being an old spinster - one of my big worries in life).