Two-for-one juvenile sculpture giggles from my home town

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 09 February 2007 21:03:59

<I wish to make clear that I do not condone art theft, or deliberately giving offence, but I laughed anyway>
<<yes, I am letting my inner 13-year old out to play, and will probably type 'fnar fnar' before the end of this post>>

Having a quick (honest) look at the BBC website this afternoon, I discovered that an act of art theft had taken place in Grantchester, at the Old Vicarage where once stood the clock at ten to three, and there was honey still for tea. The Old Vicarage is now, as politics/farce watchers will know, the home of Jeffrey Archer and his fragrant lady. A few years ago, when Steve and I both lived at home, Dad often used to take us and Mum to work in the mornings, a trip which involved passing the Old Vicarage. In the garden there was a piece of bronze sculpture which has recently been stolen. It was of er, a naked man and four sheep. I'm saying nothing .... The sculpture is properly called Shepherd and Sheep but, as it is made of greyish-greenish metal, my bruv soon christened it Man of Green-Grey Balls in homage to early 20th century Canadian children's literature.

As if that wasn't enough, I then spotted a link at the side of the page proclaiming 'Student is fined for snow phallus'. Yup, some young anarchist (in the Rik from the Young Ones sense of the word) decided to use the weather yesterday to build a giant snow willy. The place where he did so was a good place in that it was a large open space in the centre of Cambridge, regularly crossed by folks travelling by foot or bike, both of which are faster options than the roads. Also it has the medieval-nomenclature-makes-for-adolescent-sniggering name of Parker's Piece (and, slushy trivia fans, was where Spike and I had our first ever snog, on 3rd November 2001). The only snag with Parker's Piece for rude snow sculpting purposes is that it's right outside the police station, and Old Bill apparently weren't impressed.

Still, this 18-year old History student from Anglia Ruskin University has done us proud, proving we have no need to feel inferior to the folks at the 'proper' University. Keep your Tripos and your Double First Blues or whatever, we know how to make incisive social commentary.

Tina, BA (Hons) History and Sociology, 1999, Anglia Ruskin (formerly Polytechnic) University