Categories: uncategorized
Date: 06 January 2007 16:02:06
...women & men.
we're so different! yet so much the same.
I work in a large school setting and can count the number of men in the building on one hand. My office is filled with women... four speech therapists share one end of an office space (large, open room). The other side is occupied by two social workers (women) and their assistant (the sole man - let's call him D). D is in his late 40's, maybe early 50's. Retired military, does this job for the fun of it (good thing he doesn't need the money - pay is terrible)
One of the speech therapists and I are becoming good friends - you know, office mates. Her name is K. And K and I have lunch together, share materials, collaborate, etc. on a regular basis. We also display a highly tuned sense of humor, which D appears to enjoy. I think D enjoys our company - sometimes he'll eat lunch at the same time, and we have across-the-room-disucssions about this and that. Very light and breezy.
One day, K mentioned how much she loves Indian food, but she doens't eat it often because none of her friends like it. I mentioned how I've never eaten Indian food...er, well, I've never been to an Indian resturaunt...for a variety of reasons. (both D & K were shocked). And D loves Indian food.
The next day, D mentions to me (in front of his colleagues) what did I think about going to House of India for lunch this weekend with K? I said 'super!'. Later, when she was back in the room, we asked K, she said 'wonderful!'.
The next day D gives me his cell/home number...and directions to House of India. On a post-it note. Great - thanks! He also gives a post-it to K later, just in case something comes up - otherwise we'll meet at House of India for lunch on Saturday at 12:30 (because i wanted the half hour - easier to be on time with a X:30 instead of an x:00)
The difference between men and women comes here:
- When they were alone, D's two female colleagues asked K to come over and talk to them... asked if we three (k, d, me) were really going to lunch on Saturday... and that they weren't invited. They were trying to pick information...make it into something more than what it was.
- another speech therapist was near when D gave me his post-it w/ contact info on it (she's the one that drives all of us crazy, doesn't do her job well, she's a poor therapist, AND she has absoluately no social skills... odd for a communication specialist) anyway - she turned her head, and i tried to downplay what she heard by not discussing it with D at that moment.... [i mentioned this to K, and she hopes this person won't start rumors - that woman has done this in the past.]
now, i know it's the nice thing to invite everyone under the sun... but i wasn't the one who proposed the lunch. it wasn't my job to do the inviting.
and - here's the clincher. all of this social caddiness is going on between the women... and D is being very practical. He loves Indian food, K loves Indian food but never gets to go b/c her friends don't like it, and I've never really tried it (i don't think). Let's go to a restaurant for lunch. There. Simple.
I think he enjoys our company and the daily verbal banter... sometimes you need people in your workplace who can make the stress of the day easier :)
Anyway, social dynamics are interesting, especially between women and men... wouldn't you agree?