Categories: uncategorized
Date: 01 April 2006 21:06:12
I'm not sure why I feel the need for change. It could be Spring has sprung and the new season with new life and growth is having an "earth mother" effect on my hormones. It may well be that the health problems last weekend (which I have still not fully recovered from) have scared me into thinking - help! And it just could be that I'm menopausal, restless and feel then need to "hit the road" in one way or another.
I'm not sure about hitting the road in the literal tense, especially as I have the two choices of by foot or by public transport, but more strking out and doing something new with and in my life.
Church is a definite area of change as from tomorrow I will no longer be on the DCC, having served for 3 years, so no longer making decisions, agreeing expenditure and having responsibility and accountability for and to the fellowship.
Last night I finished typing up the final set of minutes (at least one month late) and set about doing a quick review of the last year for tomorrow's AGM. It felt as if it was my way of handing things over to others. Someone else will be picking up the baton and running with it. Someone who may need encouragement to recognise that they have the ability to serve God on the committee. Someone who would welcome being asked to stand for election but has been frightened because they feel they aren't clever enogh. Or perhaps someone who has been scared of some of the personailities on the committee.
To be honest I don't regret having to stand down, and I did not want to play the trick that some at my church do of standing for the PCC for 3 years so they never miss a year. To me the rules are there for a couple of reasons - to give you a break and to enable others.
It does sadden me when people are scared to pass the baton to other people. Yes, you do lose control! Then again the "control" was never yours in the first place but God's. I'm looking forward to seeing how God uses new faces and different gifts on both the PCC and DCC. Will the committees remain the same or will God's Holy Spirit blow new life and power into the church?
As I was writing the overview yesterday I became aware that I was handing my role over to someone else (as yet unknown). I was also aware that God is providing others to take on responsibilites and that people like me need to stand back, observe and encourage.
I was also aware that it could be time for me to move on. When I started going to this church I was at the end of an abusive marriage. i did not know who I was, what I could do and whether I could get through each day. it's been a gradual process but God has opened doors for me and I now do far more than I ever thought would be possible - leading services, preaching, creative prayer. I have been given the opportunity to grow and mature in my faith. I am a new creation when you compare me to who I was when I first went there.
And whilst I love this church so much, I know that others need to be brought to a place where they can develop their spiritual personality and gifts. It's time to make way for new preachers, teachers and leaders.
One thing I'm certain of is that wherever God leads me it will be moving forwards - developing the gifts God has given me and discovering new ones. Hitting the road but not travelling alone.