Of finding a dress to fit

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 27 November 2007 09:43:45

My figure could possibly be described as Rubenesque ... some days Rubenesque plus!

I'm quite happy with most of it, though there are bits which can definitely go - and have been going and will continue to - but generally pretty happy. I love my extra broad shoulders. I love being busty (most of the time - it's not all joy). I like having hips and a booty. Quite happy to be muscly as well - really happy actually, having shared a house with three excessively wimpy girls who drove me nuts!

At the moment, though, I am annoyed with it all ... or, more accurately, I am annoyed with all the shops that buy from designers who refuse to believe that all women are not created equal (with equal being approximately a Size 12 [Australian] with no boobs and, possibly, no bum). The designers who make dresses with shirred tops for grown up women (not really suitable for anyone over 6, come on, be honest). The designers who have not realised that those of us with a larger bust simply cannot wear a dress with spaghetti straps without it HURTING! (let alone the falling out the sides part). The designers who have not realised that, when the top is cut to an empire waist, if a girl is busty that's basically an invitation for anyone who wants to to come on in and check out her navel!. The designs who obviously have never lived in an Australian summer (or Spring or Autumn, if it comes to that) and therefore have not worked out that polyester linings and jersey knits are really NOT fabulous fabrics for summer dresses! Petticoats are not a sensible idea! Tightly fitted bodices are ridiculous! And who wants a ‘waist' that starts under your boobs! Sure, sometimes we want to hide our hips, and we'd like a floaty cool sundress, but honestly!!!!!!!

What do I want?

I want a simple dress.

In cotton or something similarly light.

In interesting patterns but definitely not white.

With straps that you can stick your bra under.

Not cut down to my navel.

Not body ‘skimming'.

Without shirring.

Not ankle length.

No ruffles.

No flares.

No ‘interesting' jewelled, feathered, or dangly bits.

No layers.

No zips!

I really need to get out my sewing machine, find a pattern and some fabric, and make my own, don't I. Darn it!