Things I would love to write on reports and can't

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 25 November 2003 23:53:08

I am in the process of report writing at the moment and for tutor reports one of my standard comments is based on a student being pleasant, smartly dressed, punctual and having a positive attitude. This becomes difficult when the person in question grunts when you speak to them, looks worse than Worzel Gummidge, doesn't even know what time school starts never mind arriving at the required time and the main ambition they have is to wind up teachers. I am meant to write positive things and set targets. Targets is easy of course...

Anyway, here are somethings it would be nice to be able to write-

1. Since my last report, this student has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

2. This student should not be allowed to breed.

3. This student has delusions of adequacy.

4. This student sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

5. This student has misplaced his braincell.

6. If this student was any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

(Sort of borrowed - with changes)