Two days ago

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 23 May 2006 13:31:27

I was reminded of a bad joke.

I heard Tommy Cooper tell it, and it's really quite succinct which is probably why I can manage to remember it. It goes like this: dodgy bloke approaches respectable bloke in street and says "Have you got any nude photos of your wife?" Respectable bloke looks disgusted and says "No, of course not". Dodgy bloke says "Do you want some?"

What reminded me of this was my daughter giving another of her prophesies. It was, as usual, in the middle of dinner, while my wife was out somewhere. "When I am a lady I will have a wee yee". Being small, her pronunciation is sometimes a little unorthodox. Usually I can guess from the context what she is trying to say, but this time I had to get her to repeat herself a few times before I understand. She can't (won't?) make the sound "ll" and makes a "y" sound instead (which will be fantastic when she learns Spanish, but ain't so great for English). So I finally understood that she was referring to a part of what is traditionally thought to be solely male anatomy. So of course I replied "No, boys have willies, girls don't". Hah, that was easily dealt with, I thought. For two seconds. Then she says "But Mummy has a weeyee". With a sinking feeling I had no choice but to say "No she doesn't". "Yes she does". "Er no, actually, she doesn't". "Yes she does". "Er, no, no really, trust me, she doesn't". "Yes she does". At which point I felt the need for some proof for my assertion ... we'll draw a veil over what happened next.