Two months ago

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 18 July 2006 13:05:54

I was attacked by a biscuit.

Ok, that's perhaps overstating things a little, but I bit into an innocuous-looking chocolate digestive only to find that some swine had put something like glue inside it. At which point the person standing next to me burst out laughing because he had just had the same experience (there was a plate of these adulterated biscuits waiting to be eaten). And we discovered together that the biscuits were actually made that way. Some idiot has taken a perfectly good biscuit recipe and decided to insert caramel inside. So when you bite into it expecting that nice biscuity crunchy instead you get a horrible gooey sensation and the feeling that the rest of the damnable biscuit won't let go of you. Now, I'm not an expert on biscuits, but they are obviously things that are cooked twice. To make them crunchy. So a biscuit which is not crunchy is wrong. Either it's been left too long and it's gone soft, or it's been made by someone who has gone soft in the head.