Anger - better suppressed or expressed?

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 23 April 2005 00:22:58

Just come back from the cinema and randomly started thinking back to a situation I found myself in last December. I feel as though I need to share it with someone, but everyone else in this house is asleep.

I was coming towards the end of my hospital placement in a children's ward, when my 92 year old Gran died. I took time off work to go to the funeral, but other than that continued working. For some time none of the other staff on the ward knew about my recent bereavement. During this time a couple of comments were made which i found very upsetting, as if someone had stabbed me. Another student on the ward was keen to see a post mortem (my Gran was at this time having a post mortem, in another part of the country) and kept ringing up the department, but no one required one in this hospital at this time. The student said in frustration 'ohhh, I wish someone would hurry up and die'. On another occasion a staff nurse said 'wait till some old codger has popped his socks'.

Both times I felt incredibly hurt. I felt like replying 'would you mind being a little more sensitive, my Gran was an old codger who popped her socks last weekend, but I still loved her'. I didn't trust myself to do this calmly and without bursting into tears and recking up any relationships I had with the staff. So both times, I simply left the room.

Looking back I really don't know if I did the right thing. I know the staff were not aware of my personal situation, but I still think they should have shown more consideration, to their colleagues and to all the 'old codgers' out there.