Categories: uncategorized
Date: 21 April 2005 21:12:48
Big mistake - I stood on the scales at work, and discovered that they have me as half a stone heavier than my own scales do. So I tried out a few of the scales round the surgery but they're all saying the same thing. Hmm which to trust: the surgery scales which are professionally calibrated every year, or my own cheapo bathroom scales from Matalan? (I know which ones I want to trust, but anyway). Oh well, at least I know I'm going down - it's just a little further to my target than I thought.
Interesting counselling session tonight, it's showing me very clearly how I go all out 200% for whatever I'm doing (PhD application, diet, whatever) but how when I feel vulnerable about any of those things I come crashing down to the point where it's all terrible and awful and woe is me. I know that's a lot of my inner drama queen coming out, but I do think it would be good if I could function at a slightly less extreme level. It would be less stressful, anyway. We also talked about the tension between my strengths and my vulnerabilities (often two sides of the same coin), I don't think I'm very good at letting them co-exist, they each keep trying to crowd the other out. So I do feel that I'm getting some insight into what makes me tick, which is good, though sometimes I think I should just get over myself. Easier said than done though!