waiting

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 24 January 2006 12:58:04

How do you wait for someone to die? Yesterday my father-in-law was finally given a prognosis on what happens with his cancer. Put bluntly, he hasn't got long, and it is no great surprise given the endless trips to casualty, intensive care visits and other events of the last few years.
But we are not used to measuring people's lives in weeks - and apparently the doctors seldom get their estimates right anyway. So even on a practical basis it is hard to know what to do. Spend to much time there and you will either exhaust or worry him. Too little, and you risk him feeling abandoned, or you risk regretting it later.
And mixed with all the obvious sadness there is tons of practical stuff to worry about. Do we go on holiday? I don't know, but the travel insurer was very helpful this morning. Apparently we are covered if we have to cancel.
It's not up to me to decide whether we go or not - Mr Fishsoup has to do all that I think. But I need to know how best to support him, how to structure my time and look after him and his/our family.
Serious stuff. When did life get so grown-up and sad and scary?