Categories: god-related-stuff
Date: 10 January 2011 15:07:16
We have had a sombre weekend - Clare and I visited Danièle on Saturday. She was surrounded by her family, but her desolation was evident. "What will I do? What will I do?" she repeated... Her utter dependence on Paul (and his on her) was clear to all of us.
Another friend wrote to me: J'ai annoncé aux enfants cette nouvelle qui est, pour eux, très tristes, et surtout, ils se demandent comment Mme Perret va orienter et adapter sa "nouvelle" vie ; ils ont tous les 4 connu le "couple" qu'ils faisaient ensemble. (TR: I told the children (they are aged between 15 and 24) which is , for them, very sad, and above all they wondered how Mme Perret was going to adapt to her new life. All four of them knew the "couple" who did everything together)
I am sure this is the most difficult thing for any spouse left: adapting to being one where you had always been two. Especially if, like Paul and Danièle, you had hardly spent a night apart (1 week in 40 years of marriage.)
I went to church yesterday - the first time in about 3 months - and for most of the service I sat huddled in my corner and wept. I did manage a prayer at the Eucharist, but most of the time I didn't do too well. And then this morning was the funeral: first at church, where there were many, many people, and then here, in St Just, at the cemetary. The eulogies were very moving, especially their older daughter Isabelle's, as she spoke of Paul's faith, and how he had taught her, as an earthly father, what the love of our heavenly father can be. The words that kept recurring in describing Paul were: faith, strength, justice, integrity, kindness, and love.
He has been buried in the new part of the cemetary - the nicest part, I think, with grass and wooden steps, instead of the formal stone tombs and gravel paths and stone steps. There will be a simple slab, but I like the thought that, instead of flowers at Toussaints (see here for an explanation) those who visit will take a pebble and start to build a little cairn in memory. Paul loved geology and I know of two people inspired to follow a profession in geology by him; it would be fitting if we left pebbles...
At the graveside, one of the church members read a passage from Habakkuk. He said that when he heard of Paul's death he oened his Bible, and it fell open at a passage he and Paul had discussed. It talks of a desert, which Paul had compared to his illness, but then ends with a cry of faith and love for God. Rest in peace, cher ami
Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Saviour. The Sovereign LORD is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to tread on the heights.