Categories: uncategorized
Date: 07 April 2007 10:47:59
Popped into M&S to obey the call of nature the other day, not knowing that it would end in my near extermination by the Daleks.
Prominently located to capture the unwary, a full bank of Daleks occupied the centre of the store. They looked fairly static, almost harmless, so I approached them and foolishly touched one. I was met by a response of 'Exterminate!' This caused me to decide that the best course of action in this case would be to capture one for each of my nephews, who are well versed in Dalek-lore. I wrestled two into my arms, and carried them to the Dalek-trading post, with one of them calling out 'Exterminate!' again. The full monetary requirement for removing them was handed over and they were placed in a special, Dalek-proof M&S bag. This annoyed them, especially when I inadvertantly bashed the bag against a clothes rail (well, the Daleks were pretty bulky) and an irate cry of 'Exterminate!' emanated from the depths of the M&S containment system.
I bundled them into my car boot on arrival at the car park and proceeded to drive away. As I reached the exit, repeated cries of 'Exterminate! Exerminate!! EXTERMINATE!!!' emanated from the back of my Transport And Ropey Driving In Suburbia machine. With lightning reflexes I braked (after checking my rear view mirror, naturally) and the Daleks were finally silenced.
However, I had been so distracted that I entered the wrong lane of the exit and ended up taking a circuitous route home. Perturbed at this, I muttered beneath my breath,
'Agh! The Daleks made me go the wrong way!'
Not something that happens every day in Newport. In Cardiff, when pretending to be London, perhaps, but not in Newport. :)
(Btw, the Daleks in question were made of organic chocolate for Easter, with a touch sensitive sound chip - true to the Christian tradition ;)