An enquiry...

Categories: uncategorized

Date: 23 April 2007 20:38:46

...has been made regarding the precision of my book reviews and the methods of calculation involved. Allow me to explain, it's all quite straightforward.

LH + UC + OER ÷ PN = ERPP

Then,

ERPP + SIBUOL - BP = PR

Then,

PR - TFAWR = FR

LH = Laughing Hysterically
UC = Uncontrollable Crying
OER = Other Emotional Responses
PN = Page Numbers
ERPP = Emotional Responses per Page
SIBUOL = Smiles Induced by Use of Language
BP = Boring Pages
PR = Provisional Rating
TFAWR = Times Fallen Asleep While Reading
FR = Final Rating

I would like it to be known that I am indeed available to sit on judging panels for literary prizes given adequate renumeration for my undoubted skills. Enquire via my agent.