Categories: uncategorized
Date: 31 July 2004 19:39:08
...an agony uncle. Or whatever the correct masculine term is. I'm not sure how it happened really, one day I was plodding along minding my own then suddenly the previous occupant of my room came back to stay for a few days before going to Rome for the summer - one of the perks of doing a degree in Italian! Anyway, a 12 year relationship takes, I'd imagine, a lot of energy (and a bit of time) to get over. So, all those counselling books I once read have been coming in useful. I guess the question is how do you help someone who is 37 but has spent 12 years from the age of 23 in a relationship (her first relationship) to get the hang of dating? I guess I'm trying to convince her that multiple short-term flings aren't really going to be very good for her. But then you must allow people to live their own lives and just be a friend. Anyway, this has thrown up multiple conversations with friends about relationships lately. And it seems we're all confused. Basically we (well, my friends) seem to want long-term relationships but we will not allow ourselves to be made into a different person by anyone else, however gorgeous she/he may be. I guess what we're all looking for is someone who just accepts us exactly as we are. And yet time and time again we seem to be hell-bent on changing those people we love by making them more like us. Yep, we humans have an infuriating habit of killing the things we love. Milan Kundera was exactly right! Shall venture forth with a renewed commitment to, as John Cage puts it, leave a space round the other, allow them to think of themself in their own terms.
So, in the video shop from which I am blogging at the moment Talking Heads are on the stereo, and great do they sound, oh yes. Sing along now, 'you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful house, you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful wife...'
As you may have guessed, still to suss out the mobile blogging thing.
It's a gorgeous evening here in Glasgow so I'm off to wander the streets for a while, camera in hand.
Buonna Notte.