Categories: uncategorized
Date: 27 January 2008 20:00:19
For example, yesterday I learned that when actors/actresses go to a voice coach to develop/improve their Geordie accent one of the key phrases that the enlightened contemporary voice coach is likely to use is: "John Paul Getty has broken the photocopier." Instant Jimmy Nail / Hairy Biker.
I also learned yesterday that the Highway Code has a sign in it meaning "No cars carrying explosives past this point!" I am rather concerned as I have never seen such a sign. Does this mean that one is allowed to carry explosives in ones car unless there is a sign informing one not to? And does petrol count as an explosive? Hmmm, tricky.
This morning I learned that if one is feeling particularly bleary (Cockney rhyming slang: Dr. Timothy Leary) early in the morning and attempts to traverse the turning in the hallway at too high a velocity then the rug slips on the polished wood floor and that the action of gravity upon ones person can have a sudden and deleterious effect upon ones posture resulting in Olympic standard bruises. Ouch.
I don't normally make New Year resolutions, if I need / really want to do something then I do it whatever time of year it is. So this isn't really a New Years resolution, it's just a resolution which happened to coincide with the British New Year. Anyway, said resolution is (drum roll): to get a full motorcycle licence. Hence my sudden interest in the Highway Code. I've booked my theory test, I've been revising hard, I've searched www.youtube.com for motorcycle accidents (if I'm going to do it then I want to do it with my eyes open...figuratively and literally!) and I can't find a single crash which isn't caused by either the rider being an idiot or failing to presume that the other drivers on the road are idiots. Mind you, after failing to negotiate the hallway this morning I'm having second thoughts. Now to soak my bruises in a bubblebath...