Categories: anything-and-everything
Date: 27 April 2007 22:56:48
A couple of pretty minor incidents have left me feeling like a right heel at the moment! Now in the big scheme of evilness and all that, these incidents are hardly noteworthy, but they've really bothered me because the people involved are already in 'groups' who get marginalised and probably get overlooked or have assumptions made about them. And the thing is, I really care and always want people I meet to know that whatever anyone else thinks, they are valuable and loved by God - even if stuff they've done is pretty rubbish. In particular, I have a soft spot for teenagers - and not just the 'nice' ones. So this evening, I was running our youth club which is our Friday night open place for 8 - 13 year olds. While we were setting up there was the not uncommon group of older teens sitting between the hall and the church drinking (started nice and early tonight!). About three quarters of the way through the session there was a crashing at the hall door (which stays locked on a yale latch) and some of the teens were trying to get in - so I went out there, said hello and asked what I could do for them. One lad wanted to use the loo - now this could have been a genuine desperate request (they had been drinking for a good while!), or it could have been a ploy just to get in the hall and get up to no good - we come across both (and even if it was the first, we couldn't let an older lad who'd been drinking in with our young ones). So I said, "sorry, we've got a load of young kids in here and we can't let people in and out." So he turned and walked away mumbling "I only wanted to go to the loo." But we just don't know - some of them get up to no good and some of them don't - but all I could think was I've stood here in a dog collar and sent you away, and that's not what I want to do. I don't have a problem with challenging the kind of stuff they can get up to when someone else is being treated badly - injustice and all that - but I hate having to be suspicious without being able to say, "just because I can't let you in here it doesn't mean we don't care about you, and God cares even more." But then I'm just a big soft touch who goes looking for the ones who everyone else hates or moans about! Still, I prayed for him (ignoring the fact that he might do what the ones staggering home from the pub do - and pee up my garden gate next to the church hall!).
And the other thing happened yesterday. I was driving home from having done a bit of shopping in the northest* bit of London. I'm always careful at zebra crossings and always stop if there's someone there (which in London can be unusual!). So as I approached a crossing I didn't see anyone - until I was almost on top if it -when I saw a man in a motorised wheelchair sitting there, so I braked (nothing behind me) but there was no way I was going to be able to stop in time so I waved apologetically and carried on (rather relieved he hadn't just started crossing anyway!). But just as I did that two women, who I think were traffic wardens, but could have been police, came round the corner and saw what happened. I felt bad enough that I hadn't stopped but then I made eye contact with one of them and she just shook her head at me and that really made me feel like a total heel! I wanted to get out of the car and apologise to the man who looked, as he sat there, like he was used to being ignored. I won't say what I wanted to say to the woman though! So as I drove home I prayed for him... sometimes, when we make a total hash of reflecting God, it's the only thing that seems worth doing!
And the reason I mention these two seemingly insignificant events is that you hear so many stories of the effect of a simple act of kindness on someone - of shocking people with grace... and where was mine?
*I don't think this word is official! :D