Categories: uncategorized
Date: 24 March 2003 13:46:00
during the service i mostly sat and thought about other things.
the location shall remain nameless and is not local. I went to a church yesterday which i will be ticking off on my list of churches not to go to while i am in london next year (for 8 months from september. although if there were 8 months in september, actually, we could get a lot more done). (ok i feel that geographical hint is broad enough for you to not be able to identify the church).
Anyway... this church... made me realise that that is what people think i am part of when i describe the one i'm part of as a house church. i must stop saying that. More raised arms than a right guard advert, and while i don't have a problem with that exactly, massively formulaic and front stage-led, and whilst i don't have a problem with that exactly (well, kind of), slightly irritating 'yeah, god, we're cool' kind of attitude, yet again it's not that i have a problem with (the worship guy was probably just being himself, or being someone he'd like to be), there was a general atmosphere of blatant self-congratulation (i do have a problem with that! hurrah, at last). Anyway i conclude that I have a Spirit of Judgement over people being enthusiastic in church and have no desire whatsoever to have that cast out (i quite like it! it makes me smug and self-congratultory. How damned ironic). It wasn't exactly the parts, although they were difficult enough, it was the sum of them that was the really awful thing.
Gah.
Also afterwards someone i don't know very well but just a bit came over and said 'it's a really good church isn't it - it's big, but really good' and i managed to kind of say 'oh, well' in a way that might have sounded like consensus but i knew was absolutely not.
Saving grace? there was one... the music actually was quite good and i fancied a sing. that fantastic song 'before the throne of god above' which has the line 'and god the just is satisfied// to look on him and pardon me' or something was sung, quite loudly by me if you must know. good music interspersed with rather dictatorial instruction 'now we'll all stand to sing', well all right, if i feel like it, who died and made you ruler of my stature? oh, ok, that's just me having attitude.
Final answer; christians on the whole are good people trying to do the right thing. However, this doesn't mean i have to hang around with all of them. Phew.