Categories: uncategorized
Date: 02 November 2007 16:22:21
Progress report, October 31, 2007:
Grandma Carolyn is doing very well. That cut across her forehead was bone deep; the staples are out now, and all the swelling around forehead and eyes, etc., gone down days ago.
You can tell how big a flap it was, cut loose, though. No doubt that would have been hanging over her eyes if she'd not been pressing the wound up and closed when I saw her that night.
She sits in her wheelchair a lot. That's probably a good thing. She doesn't enjoy her new stand-up recliner very much -- you've seen the commercials for those on TV -- not that she doesn't enjoy the way it would help her up if she needed it, but the chair itself is rather firmly cushioned. Not all broken-down and with hollows and lumps in all the right places to feel comfortable to her, like her old chair. (Grandpa gleefully got rid of the old chair -- which was, really, a love seat. Next on his agenda is that tatty old sofa...)
Things are working to eventually have the in-laws sell or donate or sign over -- however is easiest, best, quickest to do it -- the house to Mike. That's Grandpa's hard work, and Grandma & Grandpa's life together, that bought and paid off the mortgage on that little house, and the Spouse is their only child. All those half-brothers from Ma's first marriage would each get an interest in the house if she and Grandpa died, however. Hubby would get Grandpa's half-interest plus an additional fractional interest just like all his half-brothers, as the inheritors of Grandma's half. So, Hubby would be in majority control -- but would still need all those brothers, and all the offspring of the deceased brothers, to agree and sign off to accept their portion of the money if Mike wanted to sell the house, or forgo interest in ownership and let him alone.
He'd rather abandon his interest in the house altogether, than to wrangle over the details with any of those relatives, some of whom have had significant drug and alcohol abuse problems, and some of whom are "long lost", nowhere to be found.
And frankly, although I understand the reasons behind community property laws and inheritance laws the way they are here in Louisiana, in a case like this they sure are a pain in the bee-hind, and not especially fair. So I am glad that the in-laws approached their son and me about buying the house.
Also about moving into it. It needs major cosmetic renovation, and some practical remodeling. Grandpa, for example, wants to cannibalize a closet, a hallway, some unused space in the utility room, to make two full baths out of the 1.5 baths the house has now. Also, he'd like to get rid of the bathtub and have a walk-in shower, or even one of those walk-in bathtubs with a little door, have you seen those advertised?
I really really really do not enjoy a consolidated household. We lived with them a couple of different times over the years, as a very young newly wed couple, and when the kids were in their middle-school years. I couldn't take it. Well, I did take it, but I didn't like it much. Hubby finally had enough of it, and we moved out.
Nothing to do with them. They are great people. Couldn't ask for better in-laws or more supportive grandparents for the little ones. It's just the consolidation of households, I guess, being irritating. Lack of privacy. The amazing little things that get so irritating that you want to scream. Like the 5,000 decibel level Grandma seems to enjoy TV at.
I don't want to blend the households, to move in there again, until the remodeling is done and over with. And neither my Spouse nor his parents wants us to sink a lot of money into remodeling until our control of the future of the house is cemented -- not until Hubby owns it!
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November 2, 2007:
Louisiana is not only a community property state, but because of the roots our laws have in the Napoleonic Code (IMO that's why anyway) -- even if the in-laws tried to arrange a will to leave the house only and completely to Hubby, it would either be easily overturned, or at least it would have lots of ways to contest it and tie things up in a wrangly probate for years. They already have a basic will; that isn't gonna be enough.
All Heck could break loose if some one or more of the potential inheritors wanted to contest it -- and who knows how some of those wacky folk might react?
Even if they none of them wanted any interest, it would still take all sorts of hunting down of heirs and advertising for the long-lost ones and waiting waiting waiting to be able to tie up ownership tight and un-contestable.
And, if I am gonna move in there and take over the burdens and bills of that household and help with Grandma (she fell AGAIN this morning - only a bruised knee this time, but she panicked so badly she had to take nitroglycerin) --
If I am gonna do that, there HAS to be at least some basic remodeling done. It ought to have been done anyway, long ago, but they are very independent people, especially Grandma, and used to freak out and have a fit if you went over and tried to help around the place -- couldn't even throw out 20 year old phone books without a major hissy.
And while we would undertake the effort and expense for the in-laws, even if we were not planning to live there or own it or anything -- if that's all that was needed -- I still have no desire at all to undertake the effort and expense to do it up right, only to have Grandma keel over in 6 months for example, just as I finish sinking thousands into the property -- and then I'd have the newly refurbished house lying there in the water waiting for the sharks to circle in for their share.
In other words, we need to arrange things as the in-laws would like -- it's their suggestion -- and as we would like, all four of us --
1. Hubby needs sole ownership (well, by default, I guess I'd own it too.)
2. It needs to be done in such a way that we don't buy it -- we don't have the cash to make a fair price, and the condition it's in right now would not attract a good mortgage. So if we did purchase it it would be for a token amount. Actually, we'd be buying it with our agreement to take it off in-laws' hands and to remodel and live there and help take care of Grandma, all stuff we have a hand in anyway -- but Hubby owning the place would help to make it a break-even deal, or at least not too much of a financial loss.
3. The house needs to be owned -- whether by Grandpa solely, because Grandma transfers her half-interest to him -- or by Hubby -- in such a way, with such timing, and by such an arrangement of donation or gift or purchase, whatever -- However it's done -- It needs to be done in such a way that the action would a) guarantee Grandma and Grandpa could live there; and b) would not interfere with the Medicare/Medicaid/Social Security aspects of their income & health care, should either need to be transfered into a nursing home.
I got my cousin the "domestic lawyer" to recommend her best choice of a real estate practice in town to get advice from. I will be calling them this afternoon.