Categories: uncategorized
Date: 23 March 2007 23:27:05
It is official. I am turning into a miserable old hag.
Right now I am feeling really lonely. My younger sister has been through a really difficult divorce last year and now she has met a really nice guy and I heard vague rumours that he is considering moving to the island to be nearer to her. Rumours they may be but I am feeling kind of weird about it all. I am starting to wonder whether I will ever meet anyone who I want to be with forever and who actually wants to be with me. Is it only me, or does anyone else ever get those days when they wonder what is wrong with them? I mean is it because my arse is too fat, or am I too confident which scares the shit out of men? Am I too self-sufficient or do I give off 'don't-come-anywhere-near-me-vibes'? Then I start wondering why my sister gets all the good stuff and I just get left with nothing - again. My biggest worry is that I will have to go to another of her weddings as I found her last one so difficult and right now I am starting to sound like a miserable, jealous old bitch (probably very accurate!) Also I really want to have kids and I am starting to wonder whether I ever will and even thinking about it sets off this huge bereavement in me.
Today has been a bad day. I have puffy eyes from crying and a headache. If I had some Valium i would take it.